Bottom: My Perspective

Author's Note: With this post, I am initiating a series of posts here exploring the bottom sexual position in same gender loving relationships. My plans are to periodically contribute to this series throughout the year and beyond. 

Being the bottom man in a gay sexual relationship is often one of the most confusing and confused sexual positions in the world. Most people, gay or otherwise, fail to recognize its significance within the sexual dynamics of the same gender loving community. Almost everyone associates the bottom as being the most effeminate man in the relationship. This may be true in some cases but it is far from the actual truth. I've been involved with and have dated more than a few muscled, tough-acting and very hetero-appearing men who, once the bedroom door is closed, hop into the bed with their legs spread apart and feet up in the air! 

And along those lines, I want to add here that I've dated a few effeminate gay men who were absolute, ass-tearing top men once the door closed on the bedroom. They were loaded with more testosterone than the entire U.S. Marine Corps! 

In other words, don't make assumptions without first getting to know the man. A bottom is not necessarily the sissy-punk that many imagine him to be. Besides, it isn't the level of masculinity that determines who's a bottom and who's a top. This sexual position is more about who derives the most pleasure and fulfillment in their role. 

When I first became sexually active and progressed from cock-sucking to the penetration stage, I just assumed that I was a top. At the time, I knew that I was a man and that I had a penis (cock, dick) so I automatically just made the assumption that I was a top and proceeded to fuck other men. I was always considerate and respectful towards my sexual partners but mentally, I enjoyed fucking an ass too much to even think about even trying that sexual position. Little did I know the gratification that I was missing!   

Sure, several guys expressed a sincere desire to fuck me. However, in my mind, I was a top and that was that. "I'm flattered but no thank you." was my reply to their proposition. "I'll be more than happy to fuck you." I would usually add, especially if they were handsome. For a number of years, men just accepted my explanation and allowed me to tap their asses. 

In all my sexual encounters, everything remained the same for a number of years. I naively stayed a confirmed top although I did begin to enjoy having my ass eaten-out by more than a mere handful of partners. This did arouse my curiosity about what it would actually feel like to have a man's cock inside me, But my curiosity never peaked to where I wanted to act upon it. Again, the old mindset: I am a top, exclusively. There were simply too many willing asses out there that needed my service.

Unbeknownst to me, all that was about to change. It wasn't a radical or immediate about-face. But a personal encounter took me to a new development in my sexual journey that continues, even today. 

I met Paul Turner during August, 2001. We both happened to cruise each other on a Sunday afternoon in a notorious gay cruising park, LBJ Memorial Grove, in Washington, DC. We'd both separately gone there looking for the same thing: a sexual "quickie." 

I was infatuated with Paul the very first time I laid my eyes on him. He was tall, moderately thick and with milk chocolate colored skin. He took a seat at a picnic table across from me and we both indulged in eyeballing each other before I stood up and began walking towards a well-known trail that led into a area of the park famous for being a place where gay and bisexual men had sex. 

Paul followed close behind and yes, he allowed me to fuck his ass in the park. I guess I was a good fuck as we exchanged email addresses and promised to keep in touch. We kept in contact and became regular fuck-buddies for the next couple of years. Our "workout" sessions started out being on a monthly basis but became more frequent as the years progressed. 

I slowly began to realize that although Paul was willingly giving his ass to me to fuck, he was, simultaneously, fucking the hell out of my dick. I need to correct that, he was enthusiastically fucking the hell out of my dick! And I was equally excited to offer my ass to him for the the pleasures of his tongue. Soon I was beginning to entertain thoughts about what it would actually feel like having Paul's very generous cock inside me. 

In May, 2004. we made arrangements to meet-up for another one of our many fuck-buddy sessions. This time, before we even finished with mutual fore-play, Paul asked if I would let him fuck me. By this time, I had decided that it was now my turn to discover what being a bottom was all about. 

My response was entirely different this time: "Hell, yes!" 

After our foreplay on the floor, the dining room and then the bed, he rolled me onto my back, raised my legs up and wrapped them around his waist, entered my willing ass and didn't stop pounding my booty until he delivered me, body and soul, into paradise! My man, Paul, turned me out that night! He didn't just take my virginity. The tore the shit out of my willing but inexperienced ass! Once his prodigious man-tool (penis/cock/dick) began massaging my prostate (A-spot), I shuddered with a sensation that I'd never felt before in my entire life (to that point). 

In that moment, my ass became a confirmed receptacle to any cock that wanted to explore it!  

I've never refused an opportunity to get fucked ever since that night. 

My only regret is that I hadn't met Paul at least ten years earlier! All those many and massive cocks that I missed! 

Take care and stay proud and bare!

ReNude Pride